


Life Tired

by CrazyTaraWitch



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/F, Swan-Mills Family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-10
Updated: 2016-09-02
Packaged: 2018-08-07 21:33:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,655
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7730506
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrazyTaraWitch/pseuds/CrazyTaraWitch
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The first night, Regina tried to keep working, but Emma insisted that with the kid in bed it was the perfect time for them to once again be ‘drinking buddies.’ Regina hated the term but found she rather liked the sentiment.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I initially was writing this as background for a story I've been wanting to write for quite a while, but the second chapter seems to be going in a very different direction. This story may wind up completely different than I'd originally planned, but hopefully it doesn't suck?

_"I was bone tired, marrow tired. What comes after that? Life tired? That's the kind of tired I was." ~Sunshine by Robin McKinley_

 

It’s the eighth day in a row that they’ve spent the entire evening together, just the three of them. Each night Regina has made dinner and then they’ve spent hours pouring over books, either in the Author’s mansion or the Mills’ home, until Henry’s bedtime. The first night, Regina tried to keep working, but Emma insisted that with the kid in bed it was the perfect time for them to once again be ‘drinking buddies.’ Regina hated the term but found she rather liked the sentiment.

 

Each night, after they tucked in their son and feigned ignorance that at 13 he was far too old, Regina pulled out the cider and poured them each a glass. Only once had she kicked Emma out before their drinks were finished, when the blonde dared to joke that someday soon Henry would be joining them. The other nights the women merely talked late into the night, occasionally lapsing into companionable silences that were most often broken by Emma asking a question out of nowhere, like “what was Henry’s first word?” or “is there a spell to get ketchup out of leather?”

 

Henry hasn’t gone to bed yet, even though it’s late, but he’s restless after more than a week of nothing but school and Operation Mongoose. He’s constantly fidgeting as he reads, and each time one of his mothers stands he jumps up and asks if he can get them anything. Finally, Regina does the unthinkable and suggests the take a break and watch a movie.   
Henry, to no one’s surprise, picks Thor, his current favourite of the Avengers series. (Last month it was Captain America: Winter Soldier, and Emma was caught quoting Steve Rogers no less than 3 times in a week.) When Emma heads to the kitchen to make popcorn and Henry follows, Regina’s sure he’s going to return with ice cream but decides she’ll allow it since it’s Saturday.

 

She’s just setting her book down to grab the dvd when Emma’s phone rings where she left it on the table. Regina grimaces when she sees “Killian” flashing on the screen. It’s not the first time the sheriff’s phone has gone unanswered tonight, but Regina’s still surprised when Emma on returns ignores the voicemail and merely slips the phone back into her jeans.

 

Over the next two hours, Henry and Emma act out their favourite scenes (none of the romantic ones, and Regina idly wonders whether it’s because Henry has no interest yet, or because he has no desire to act out love scenes with his mother) while Regina struggles not to laugh at their antics. It’s nearly midnight when the movie ends and Henry barely puts up a fight when his brunette mother sends him upstairs.

 

Regina expects Emma to leave as she rarely stays this late, but the mayor doesn’t protest when instead the blonde moves to the decanter and pours two glasses. No one else has acted this comfortable in her home since her mother’s invasion two years ago, but Regina finds she doesn’t mind. When Emma sits directly beside her on the couch and hands her a glass, she minds even less.

 

The silence stretches between them, and while it’s not uncomfortable Regina finds she would prefer to talk.

 

“Your phone has rung rather a lot tonight,” she observes. Emma tenses but nods, not helping the conversation along but not ending it either. “Any reason you haven’t answered it?”

 

Emma lets out a puff of air in a small sigh. “Don’t you ever get tired? Tired of acting, tired of… being something you’re not.”

 

“All the time,” Regina murmurs, looking away.

 

“I’m tired of trying to want things I don’t,  feel things I don’t. And I’m tired of trying to pretend it’s enough when it’s not. It’s not just Hook,” Emma adds, and now it’s her turn to look away. “It’s everyone. My parents want me to be this perfect daughter, magicless and pure, but half the time I can’t even stand to let them touch me. And Henry… I love him more than anything, but what the hell do Iknow about raising a teenager? He looks at me to be his hero, his  _ mom _ , but I’m still scared shitless because the last thing I ever want to do is let him down but I know I have and I know I will again. And then there’s you.”

 

“Me?” Regina asks quietly, afraid to hear what horrible piece she plays in this mess.

 

“Sometimes I think you’re the only one in this whole town who sees me for me. You don’t act like I’m some… perfect mythical Savior who can do no wrong. You know all my flaws, all my mistakes, but you still…”

 

“I still care about you,” Regina whispers. Emma looks up at her, eyes wide with shock as if she can’t believe Regina actually said the words.   
“I know what it’s like, Emma. To be cast in a role you can’t escape, to feel like no one can see passed that to who you really are. When you find someone who does, who sees the good and the bad in you but at the end of the day just sees  _ you _ … It’s intoxicating.”

 

“Is that how it was for you with Robin?” Emma asks softly.

 

Regina doesn’t look at her, pretends to brush imaginary lint off her slacks as she answers. “Robin saw what he wanted to see. Someone strong and free who had overcome their darkness. Anything that didn’t fit his image of me he tried to rationalize away. He never saw me as the Evil Queen, but he also never saw me as Regina.”

 

“If not Robin, then who? I know you and my mother have gotten close, but I think it’s fair to say she’s never had realistic expectations about anyone.”

 

Regina scoffs. “Snow thinks I’m a villain one day and a hero the next with no inbetween. I’m either good or evil, black or white. It seems there are only two people in this town capable of seeing in grey, and they’re both in this room.”

 

“Me?” it’s Emma’s turn to ask, brow furrowed in confusion. Regina rolls her eyes. “Yes, idiot, you. You know it’s like to play a part. You know what it’s like to be unwanted, and how easy it can be to get caught up in situations, or people, that make you feel wanted, even if they never feel right.”

 

“So Robin never felt right?” Emma ventures, wondering if this will be one question too far, if this will be the point the woman beside her decides this conversation has gone too far.

 

“It felt good. It felt  safe . But no, Emma, it never felt right.” Regina takes a sip of her cide, then mutters, “Not even…” but cuts herself off before she can continue, no drunk enough yet to freely admit what was about to come out of her mouth.

 

“Not even what?” Emma prompts, intrigued now.

 

Regina swallows down the rest of her glass and moves to the liquor cabinet, choosing a bottle of scotch this time. “If we’re going to have a sex talk, I definitely need more alcohol.”


	2. Chapter 2

“So Robin was bad in the sack?”

 

“There was no _sack_!” Regina says indignantly. “It was in my vault.”

 

“Right, cause that’s so much better,” Emma mocks.

 

Regina ignores her and continues. “He wasn’t **bad**. Robin was a perfectly adequate lover. It just didn’t feel…” She trails off at a loss for words.

 

“No fireworks?”

 

“Yes!” Regina agrees with a snap of her fingers. “There was no magic.”

 

“No True Love’s sex.”

 

Regina slaps her knee. “I wasn’t looking for cursing-breaking sex. But finally experiencing an orgasm would have been nice.”

 

“Wait wait wait, you’ve never had an orgasm?!? _Never?”_ Emma asks incredulously.

 

“What, are you saying you have an orgasm every time you’re with Captain Guyliner?”

 

“Definitely **not** saying that,” Emma admits. “He’s not an awful lover, but every time we sleep together I have to get away--like, fast as I can. The first time I got in my car and nearly drove out of Storybrooke, before I remembered I was supposed to have breakfast with Henry the next day. I’m supposed to love him, but all I want to do when we’re together is run.”

The blonde flushes, realizing she’s shared more than she intended, and quickly backtracks. “But seriously, no one should go--what, 70 years? Without an orgasm.”

 

“63 years, thank you,” Regina corrects primly, and Emma’s relieved when she ignores the rest. “And if Hook wasn’t the one, who has given you orgasms?”

 

“I’ve had a few. Mostly with myself.”

 

“You… masturbate?”

 

“You don’t?? But… if you don’t masturbate, how do you even know what you like?” Emma asked, genuinely baffled at the idea of such a sensual woman never pleasuring herself.

 

“I was raised to be a lady. Mother wouldn’t have thought it _proper._ ”

 

“Okay, but that was like 40 years ago. What’s stopped you since?”

 

“I spent most of that time focused on revenge. Then I had Graham warming my bed, and Henry to take care of; then you came along and I’ve barely had a moment to breathe since.”

 

“Sounds like a bunch of excuses to me. What, are you afraid of pussy?”

 

“Hardly,” Regina scoffed.

 

“Are you telling me you’ve been with women?” The blonde asks in surprise.

 

“Not women, no. But there is _one_ woman I’ve been curious about…”

 

“Who?” Emma asks eagerly, her interest piqued.

 

Regina stares at her for a long moment, the ghost of a smile gracing her lips. “I think that’s quite enough sharing for one night, don’t you Miss Swan?”

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

The next night is Sunday, and it’s barely an hour after they finish dinner that Regina ushers Henry upstairs to get ready for bed. As soon as the water turns off in the shower Regina heads to the stairs to tuck him in, Emma following wordlessly.

 

Henry, dressed in plaid pajamas and with freshly brushed teeth, is sitting on his bed reaching for a book when his moms enter. Regina pulls the blanket over his long legs and sits beside him.

 

“You have school tomorrow,” she reminds him, Emma rolling her eyes from the doorway, “don’t stay up too late, no matter how good the book is.”

 

Henry shrugs. “It’s just a book for school, it’s not like I’m into it,” he defends.

 

“And how far ahead are you?” Emma prods.

 

“120 pages… But it’s not my fault! How am supposed to not like a girl book when there are horses?”

 

“You like whatever you like Henry. You don’t have to defend that to anyone, especially us.”

 

Henry nods, slightly mollified. “I thought it would be stupid, but I really like it.”

 

“Classics are classics for a reason, dear. Many people before you have liked them, men and women alike.”

 

“Yeah, I guess so. Thanks.” He offers his brunette mother a brief hug, and when they pull apart she kisses his forehead.

 

“Good night, Henry.”

 

“Night, kid,” Emma calls from the doorway as Regina stands and comes to join her.

 

“Night, Moms.”

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

“Soooo,” Emma drawls as soon as she has a drink in her hand, “you like a woman.”

 

“Can we please find another topic? I’m not nearly drunk enough for this one.”

 

“Fine. What’s the _real_ reason you don’t masturbate?”

 

“Emma!” Regina chastises.

 

“Alright, alright. I’ll ease off you for a bit. I’m sure you have some embarrassing questions you could ask me.”

 

Regina pauses for a long moment, contemplating. “Why are you here every night, with me, instead of out with your pirate?”

 

Emma shrugs half-heartedly. “Well, I broke up with him today so he’s probably not the best company at the moment. And I’d rather be here with you.”

 

“You like spending time with me?” Regina asks in surprise.

 

“ _That’s_ what you’re focusing on? Not that I dumped the guy everyone else is convinced is my ‘True Love’?”

 

“Of course he’s not your True Love,” Regina snaps, “he could never deserve you, and he’d be a horrible stepfather for Henry.”

 

“I didn’t know you thought so highly of me,” Emma counters with a grin.

 

“I wasn’t aware thinking you deserve more than the human equivalent of pond-scum counted as thinking highly of you.”

 

“Whatever, you totally like me,” Emma teases. A moment later her smile falters when she notices the pink glow on golden cheeks. “Wait… You totally like me!” she exclaims.

 

“I do _not_ ,” Regina hisses through clenched teeth, “and you can kindly get out of my home if you’re going to accuse me this way.”

 

“You said yourself there was a woman you like!”

 

“Yes dear, but I never said that woman was you. Maleficent is back in town. I had quite the crush on her in my younger days.”

 

Emma shakes her head. “You’re not lying, but you’re not telling the truth either.

 

“Fine,” Regina bites out. “I may have had some _mild_ curiosity when you first came to town as to what it would be like to take you as a lover. Of course that was before I knew just how insufferable you could be.”

 

“Of course,” Emma agrees, trying to hide the satisfied smile trying to break free. “I admit I’ve had a few… fantasies of my own.”

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

It’s easy, after that.

 

Easy to fall into each other.

 

Easier than something that shouldn’t be a happy ending has any right to be.

 

Regina thinks she’s the one who starts the first kiss but she’s never sure, and soon it doesn’t matter because they’re both in this. Hands roaming, mouths exploring, hearts racing.

  
Regina doesn’t come that night, but Emma does. And Regina thinks it’s the most marvelous thing she’s ever seen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to have Emma make a comment about teaching Regina how to orgasm, but I couldn't work it into the story in any way I liked. Perhaps in another fic.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter got way gooey-emotional, but it was bound to happen eventually. Enjoy your cavities.
> 
> Also, I'm sending off my computer to get fixed tomorrow, so unless I can get the next chapter done tonight this will probably be the last update for a few days. This story should be 5-6 chapters in all.

“Do you think Mom’s okay?” Henry asks her on Wednesday afternoon.

 

“What do you mean, kid? Are you worried she misses Robin Hood?”

 

“It’s not that; I think she’s happy, which I guess is sort of weird when we’re supposed to be searching for her happy ending. But she seems really tired lately. She even got up late this morning.”

 

“That’s pretty weird for her, huh?”

 

“Totally weird,” Henry confirms. I just want to know she’s taking care of herself and getting enough rest.”

 

Emma feels a pang of guilt, knowing she’s part of why Regina’s been staying up late. First they were just drinking together, but the last three nights… Well, she can’t regret how they’ve spent their evenings, but she’ll make sure tonight goes differently.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They make their way to the study as soon as Henry is off to bed. Regina closes the door behind them and saunters over to Emma, an extra sway in her hips that makes the younger woman moan. This may be harder than she thought.

 

“Regina…” she begins as the mayor lowers herself onto her lap. “I, uh… Oh god…” she mumbles when she feels lips and teeth nip at her ear. “You know I want you, right?”

 

“I think your whimpers are making that quite clear, darling,” Regina teases.

 

“I do, want you,” Emma stammers, “but it’s been a long week. Maybe we could just… rest for a night?”  


She feels the moment Regina tenses, practically feels the walls going up inside her.

 

Regina stands and steps back just far enough to be out of Emma’s reach. “Yes, of course, you’ll want to be getting home.”

 

“Regina, I…”

 

“It’s fine, Miss Swan. Go get some rest. I should do more researching anyway; I’ve been slacking off with so many… _distractions_.”

 

 _Distractions_. Is that all Emma was to her? A distraction? Someone--something--to pass the time until Robin returned or she found someone else? Emma knew it wasn’t true, and yet it had been true so often before. She was a place-holder, easily replaced. Her foster parents replaced her with a new baby of their own; her real parents replaced her with a baby brother they’d actually get to raise; even Henry had gone back to living with Regina and had little use now for a second mom. Emma never meant anything to anyone; she was never irreplaceable, and she had been foolish to think it would be different with Regina.

 

“Sorry for distracting you,” Emma said tersely, standing from the couch and moving towards the door. “It won’t happen again. See you around, Madame Mayor.”

 

Her hand was reaching for the front door when she heard footsteps behind her. “Emma, wait!”

 

Emma didn’t want to turn around, didn’t want to let Regina see the tears forming in her eyes even now, but she had rarely heard Regina sound so pleading and her resistance crumbled when she felt a hand come to rest against her arm.

 

“What did I do, Emma?”

 

“You called me a distraction. Maybe that’s all this was for you, something to fill that hole that Robin left, but I wanted it to be more. If it can’t be more than that I get it it; it hurts, but I’ll be okay. But I need time Regina. I can’t just… go back to pretending I don’t want you, at least not right away.”

 

“You’re not a distraction,” Regina insists, holding tight to Emma’s arm now. “I shouldn’t have said that. You were pulling away and I didn’t know _why_ , so I lashed out. I’m sorry, Emma. You’re not a distraction. You are… so much more than that.”

 

“Promise?” Emma whispers, so quiet Regina’s not even sure she’s meant to hear.

 

“Oh Emma…”

 

There are arms wrapping around her from behind and a cheek resting against her shoulder and she lets the tears fall.

 

“I didn’t want to leave,” Emma whispers. “I just wanted to sleep. With you.”

 

“And what do you want now?” Regina asks, punctuating the question with a feather-light kiss to the back of her neck.

 

“Will you hold me?” Emma asks, struggling not to feel weak. “Just till I fall asleep?”

 

“Always,” Regina murmurs.

 

The brunette slips her hand into Emma’s and leads her quietly up the stairs. When their teeth are brushed they’re lying cuddled together, Emma finally breaks the silence. “Always would be nice.”


	4. Chapter 4

By Friday afternoon, Henry isn’t the only one worried about Regina. 

 

Emma stops by Town Hall to bring Regina lunch and thinks it’s cute that Regina’s napping in her chair. But when Regina is still tired in the evening when Emma arrives at 108 Mifflin and suggests they order pizza so she doesn’t have to cook, alarm bells start ringing in the blonde’s head. 

 

Regina had slept well the night before, Emma knows because she’d been right beside her and kissed her awake after Regina hit the snooze. (They haven’t talked about what it means that Emma’s sleeping over now, but she doesn’t want to run and for now that feels like enough.)

 

When the pizza arrives, Henry begs to watch a movie and make a night of it. Regina wants to resist, wants to remind him that he has a math test Monday morning and that they’ve barely researched the author in days, but when Emma joins their son in begging she gives in eagerly. The second the movie is in--The Dark Knight this time, Emma’s attempt to get Henry to love DC as much as Marvel--Regina leans against Emma’s shoulder, and they’ve stretched out across the whole couch by the time the previews end. Henry takes a chair to himself, claiming it’s the only way to keep Emma from eating pizza off his plate.

 

There’s a small puddle of drool on Emma’s top by the time the movie ends and Emma almost hates to wake Regina, but she knows the older woman will get a crick in her neck (which she’ll probably blame on the blonde) if she sleeps here all night. Emma nearly wakes her with a kiss, but Henry has been throwing them curious glances and she holds back. If and when this becomes something they tell their son about, she wants it to be on their terms.

 

“Regina,” she murmurs. “Regina, the movie’s over.”

 

Regina mumbles something against Emma’s shoulder but slowly sits, blinking rapidly in the bright glow from the TV. 

 

“Come on Mom,” Henry urges, “time for bed.”

 

Regina takes the hand their son offers and stands. “You’re right Henry,” she agrees, even though it’s barely 9 o’clock. He heads toward the stairs and Regina turns toward Emma. “Well Miss Swan, time for bed. But,” she adds, one eyebrow raised in threat, “if I hear one old-person joke, you’re not invited.”

 

Emma grins and follows her up the stairs. Her worries about Regina can wait until morning; for tonight she has very important cuddling to focus on.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

“Come on Regina, this is getting ridiculous,” Emma nudges. “Henry’s worried about you.”

 

“Henry’s a child. It’s our job to worry about him, not the other way around.”

 

“Exactly. He shouldn’t have to worry about you, because you should be taking care of yourself.”

 

“Says the woman whose diet is going to give her a heart attack before age 40,” Regina scoffs.

 

“Yeah, I eat like crap,” Emma agrees. “But I still go to the doctor when I might be sick.”

 

“And if I  **were** sick, I would go. But I’m fine, and I don’t particularly feel like getting groped by Whale during an exam today.”

 

“Fine. Heaven forbid I try to keep my girlfriend safe and healthy.” The second her mouth closes Emma realizes what she’s just said and wonders how she can possibly take it back without making things even worse.

 

“Your…?”

 

“Friend! Co-parent. Lover?” Emma sighs. “Look, I don’t know what we are now. I know we really haven’t talked about what we are to each other, or what any of this--us--means. But I know I care about you, as more than just, Henry’s other mom that I have  **really** great sex with. I know it may take a long time, if ever, for us to figure out anything more than that, but I want you around to figure it all out. I want you to be okay, Regina.”

 

“Fine, I’ll go see Dr. Whale. But when there’s nothing wrong with me I’m blaming this all on you.”

 

“Wouldn’t have it any other way, babe.”

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

The following few days pass much like the week before, with Emma spending her days at the sheriff’s station and her nights on Mifflin street.

 

She’s taken it as a personal challenge now to see how many times she can make her lover orgasm (her record so far is 4 in a night), but she always stops their activities by midnight so they can rest.

 

On Thursday, Emma arrives at Town Hall with bags from Granny’s as a surprise lunch, only to be told Regina is out for the afternoon. When the response to her text is a brief  _ Seeing Dr. Whale _ , she feels a mixture of relief and dread. She wants to believe Regina was merely tired from stress and too many late nights, that Whale would send her away with nothing more than a suggestion to take better care of herself, but she fears it’s something worse.

 

Emma continues to worry for the next few hours, struggling to focus on her mountain of paperwork (though to be fair, that’s always a struggle) until David finally comes in for the evening shift and she’s free to leave. 12 minutes later she’s knocking on the door of the Mayor’s Mansion and waiting anxiously.

 

“Emma!” Henry greets her with a grin, as if it had been weeks since he’d last seen her rather than hours.

 

“Hey kid.” A smile spreads across her face as she offers him a one-armed hug, and for a few moments the worry is out of her mind.

 

Regina rounds the corner a minute later and offers Emma a smirk. Emma feels relief; this must be a good sign. Regina is fine and all this worry was for nothing.

 

20 minutes pass before Emma is able to get the brunette alone.

 

“So how did it go?” she asks, wanting to hear it for herself so she can really let this go.

 

Regina rolls her eyes. “I’m perfectly fine dear, just as I told you. There are some lab results that won’t be back until tomorrow, but it’s a formality. Whale couldn’t find a thing wrong, and abhorrent as the man is he’s generally competent. Unlike  _ some _ ,” she added pointedly.

 

“Yeah yeah,” Emma agrees playfully, “I’m incompetent and worry for nothing. Heaven forbid I want the woman I’m falling for to be okay.”

 

Regina blushes lightly and Emma can’t resist placing a gentle kiss on each cheek.

 

“I never pictured you for the sentimental type, Miss Swan,” Regina teases.

 

Emma offers her a playful nudge in response. “So I care about someone I’m sleeping with. It was bound to happen eventually.”

 

“Yes, I suppose you were bound to fall for me. Inevitable really.”

 

“Whereas you feel nothing at all for me,” the blonde prods.

 

“Well, maybe not  _ nothing, _ ” Regina admits with a smirk.

 

“Yeah?” Emma asks, trying not to grin.

 

“Yeah,” Regina agrees, the word feeling foreign on her tongue.

 

  
  
  
Regina is still tired that night, but neither of them seem to mind when she begins to drift off nestled in Emma’s arms. The Savior’s concern has largely eased, but she finds she’s still happy to watch over Regina as she sleeps.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I briefly considered writing a sequel, but since this fic hasn’t gotten much interest I think I’ll leave it here. This ending was actually what started me writing this story, and everything leading up to it has really just been build-up (and a build-up that, truthfully, I’m not super happy with). This story is done, at least for now. Thanks for reading :)

Emma wakes to sunshine streaming in through Regina’s windows. The older woman is curled around her, an arm draped across her stomach and a soft smile on her face. Emma doubts she’s ever seen Regina look so peaceful.

 

Emma grins when she realizes it’s Saturday and there’s no reason at all they can’t lay in bed for another few hours. She turns slightly to face her lover, grabbing her hand when she starts to pull away. Their fingers lace together and Emma reaches with her other hand to stroke Regina’s forehead lightly.

 

“This is good, isn’t it?” Emma murmurs. “This is worth keeping.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next time Emma wakes it’s to a knock at the door. Emma jerks, pulling away in sudden dread as she hears Henry call through the door.

  
“Mom? It’s almost time for my riding lesson.”

 

Regina is wide awake now, sitting in bed clutching a sheet to her chest. She looks fearful, but her voice comes out amazingly calm when she replies. “I’ll be down in a few minutes Henry. Get dressed and brush your teeth.”

 

They wait for a few moments until the sound of Henry’s steps fade away. “Do you think you could…” Emma gestures at herself awkwardly, “poof me home? I still haven’t mastered it myself.”

 

“Yes, of course,” Regina agrees, not meeting Emma’s eyes. “Or…”

 

“Or?” Emma asks hopefully.

 

“I usually go to Granny’s after I drop Henry off. And since I know you keep nothing of nutritious value in your apartment, I thought perhaps you’d want to come along.”

 

“Like a date?” Emma asks eagerly.

 

“Like _breakfast_ , Miss Swan,” Regina corrects with an eye roll.

 

“So we just go downstairs? Together?”

 

Regina purses her lips. “Don’t make me regret this.”

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

“So… That went well,” Emma says tentatively.

 

Regina quirks her brow, not looking at Emma as she continues to focus on the road. “What did you expect?”

 

“I thought Henry might be suspicious or something.” Emma shrugs. “He’s usually more perceptive than that.

 

“He knows you’ve spent the night before.”

 

“What?!?" Emma blurts in astonishment. "How could you not tell me Henry knows?!?”

 

“Calm down Sheriff. I meant _before_ we were together.”

 

“Oh,” Emma murmurs, mollified and slightly embarrassed at her outburst. “Wait. Did you just say we’re together?”

 

“I meant _sleeping_ together, obviously,” Regina corrects hastily. “Honestly Emma, I didn’t think I had to spell out **every** word for you.”

 

“It’s just, earlier it seemed like, maybe you were okay with Henry knowing. About us.”

 

The silence hangs between them. They’re nearing Granny’s now and Regina begins to slow, looking for a spot to park. She focuses on driving to give herself a few moments to answer.

 

“I suppose,” Regina begins as she shifts the Mercedes into park, “Henry is important to us both. I would want him to know about any important developments in our lives.”

 

Emma feels her breath catch in her throat. “And is this… us… important?”

 

Regina smiles then, hesitant but soft. “I suppose time will tell.”

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
It’s when Emma comes back from the bathroom that everything changes.

 

She finished her own food before she got up, but Regina still has half an apple pancake in front of her. Her appetite has been all over the place for the last week, but pancakes are her favourite and it's practically unheard of for the brunette not to clear her plate.

 

It's the Mayor’s cold expression and her sharp, efficient movements as she places her wallet back in her purse that tells Emma whatever intimacy existed between them this morning is at an end.

 

“It’s time to pick up Henry,” Regina says shortly. “I trust you can find your own way home.”

 

“I--yeah, sure, but--”

 

“Excellent, then I won’t keep you,” Regina cuts her off, turning to leave without another word.

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
Emma decides to call that evening before going over to 108 Mifflin, unsure of her welcome after the unpleasant parting earlier in the day. When there’s no answer, she decides to try Henry.

 

Her son answers on the first ring, but his bright voice sounds strained, the cheeriness forced. He gives no clue as to what’s wrong, but alarm bells are sounding in Emma’s head and she’s already got her jacket on and keys in hand before they hang up.

 

 

“I’ll get it!” Henry calls through the house when Emma knocks. The door opens almost instantly, but instead of letting her in Henry steps onto the porch beside her. He’s nearly as tall as her now, but he looks small in this moment.

 

“Something’s wrong with Mom.” Emma’s heart stops, then races when it begins to beat again. “She won’t talk to me, but something is _wrong_ Ma.”

 

“What’s going on, kid?” She asks gently, trying to stay calm for him.

 

“She goes quiet sometimes. When things are bad, when she’s trying not to act out and go all Evil Queen, she tenses up and she gets quiet and she shuts everybody out. But it hasn't been this bad in a long time.” Henry takes a deep breath, as if building his courage for what comes next. “I think she’s afraid.”

 

Emma pulls him into her arms, and she can’t say whether it’s to offer comfort or to hide the fear that she knows is written plainly across her own face. “We’ll figure it out Henry, I promise. Whatever it is, we’ll make things better, okay?”

 

“Because you’re the Savior?” he prompts hopefully.

 

“No, kid. Cause we’re her family.”

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Regina barely says two words during dinner and Emma is so anxious she only manages a few bites. Henry takes a different method, shoveling lasagna into his mouth as quickly as possible and then excusing himself, mumbling something about a science paper due Monday.

 

As soon as they’re alone together, Emma decides it’s time to talk. She’s never been good at dealing with this emotional crap, but when it comes to Henry and Regina she’s willing to try.

 

“Look, I know something happened during brunch today. You’ve been quiet and tense and Henry’s upset thinking the world is ending again.” She pauses, hoping Regina will respond, but when the silence stretches she speaks again. “Dr. Whale called with your test results today, right? Is that what this is about?”

 

“Not everything in my life is your business.” Regina stands quickly and gathers up the plates, walking swiftly to the kitchen without looking back.

 

Emma follows but stops several feet away, refusing to back down but trying to still give her lover space. “Maybe you’re right and it’s not my business, but I care about you Regina. I’m not saying you have to tell me everything, but I think I at least deserve to know if you’re like, dying or something.”

 

Regina turns from the sink to face Emma as she wearily replies. “Yes Dr. Whale called, and no I’m not dying.”

 

“But that is what this is about, right?” Regina nods slowly. “So whatever this is, it’s… bad?”

 

“No,” Regina whispers. “It’s big, it changes everything… but it’s not…” The brunette sighs, seeming at a loss. “It’s something I wanted very much, once.”

 

“And now?” Emma asks, brow furrowed in confusion.

 

“Now,” Regina says with a heavy sigh, “it could ruin everything.”

 

“Hey, nothing is going to ruin everything,” Emma insists, stepping close enough to reach out and stroke Regina’s arm. “Whatever it is you're not alone in this, okay? But I can’t help unless you talk to me.”

 

Regina nods slowly and takes a moment to soak in the comfort Emma offers before she speaks. “I told you about the night Robin and I were together.” Emma nods but looks no less confused. “It was unplanned, obviously, and we were… unprepared.” Realization is beginning to dawn on Emma’s face now, but Regina needs to get the words out now that’s started.

 

She needs to say this to make it real.

 

“Emma, I’m pregnant.”

Regina holds her breath for several long moments as she waits for Emma to react. Slowly, a smile blossoms across the younger woman’s face until she’s grinning ear to ear. “We’re having a baby?”

  
Regina hardly dares to believe it, hardly dares to hope. Everything she could want, Henry and Emma and a baby for them all to cherish, all within her grasp. It seems too good to be true, but she chooses in this moment to believe. “Yes, my love, we’re having a baby.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Regina’s infertility was not canon until 4B, so as this fic diverges after 4A it ignores that reveal.


End file.
